The Mabel List

Typically, the Mabel List would include the millions of random things that she has eaten.  Or the hundred items she has stolen from my countertop.  Or the dozens of critters she wants to eat.  Or the 3 places she loves to bite Mason.  But tonight, the Mabel List contains an item I never thought I would see on her list...

Mabel might actually be afraid of something.

Insane, right?

I've been at the computer for a little while tonight, and I noticed Mabel would come into the office and then leave without really fooling with me.  Not really her style, but I've been busy.  Then Dom came in and said she was acting strangely. We think she might be afraid of the thunder.  She's pacing and looking bothered.  Mabel...afraid.  Go figure.  Mason could care less.  He just wants to know when we're going to bed.  But now the rain is coming down and the thunder and lightning are getting closer and closer, and I think Mabel is about to wig out. 

We'd better head upstairs and get her comfy laying across Dom's feet so she feels like she has control of at least something in this crazy, rainy world.  She can be fearless again tomorrow. 

How Do I Love Thee? Let Me Count the Songs

My friend Jessica shares a fine tradition on her blog by celebrating birthdays with tributes to her friends. My list-making left-brained self LOVES this idea! Dom and I celebrated our anniversary on June 1, and since I have spent my time reeling from what I’ve learned about product ingredients, I have not taken the time to pay special tribute to our 14th Anniversary. I’ll have to save most of my Why-I-Love-Dom items for his birthday tribute in October, so I have put a little twist on the traditional meme. For our anniversary, and before the month runs out, here is my list of 14 songs that explain how I feel about the man I love more than life.

1. To Each His Own (Al Martino) – the song of our first dance as Mr. & Mrs.
"Two lips must insist on two more to be kissed, or they’ll never know what love can do. To each  his own, I’ve found my own. My one and only you...”

2. Johnny and June (Heidi Newfield)
“I wanna love like Johnny and June, rings of fire burning with you. I wanna walk the line, walk the line til the end of time. I wanna love, love you that much, cash it all in, give it all up…”

3. April Showers (Sugarland)
“If I had one wish, I'd wish for two. One for me, baby and one for you. And it would find you right where you are, with time on your hands and hope in your heart. We both understand we were written in the stars…”

4. November Rain (Guns and Roses)
“And when you take the time to lay it on the line I can rest my head just knowing that you are mine, all mine…”

5. I Love You Til the End (The Pogues)
“I just want to be there when the morning light explodes on your face, it radiates, I can't escape. I love you 'till the end…”

6. Cowboy Hat in Dallas (Charlie Daniels Band)
“And there ain’t a cowboy hat in Dallas if I ain’t in love with you!”

7. If You Go (Vedera)
“If you go, well I’m going with you – if you know, if you know me at all.”

8. Seat Next To You (Bon Jovi)
“Baby, say that you’ll take me wherever you’re going to. Baby, I want you to save me a seat next to you…”

9. I Need You (Tim McGraw and Faith Hill)
“’Cause I need you like a lighthouse on a coast, like the Father and the Son need the Holy Ghost…”

10. Passenger Seat (SheDaisy)
“I look to my left, see his suntanned hands, his muddy-river hair and his thousand-acre plans. I’m all shook up like a quarter in a can. Ain’t life sweet in the passenger seat?”

11. Huckleberry (Toby Keith)
“Baby I'll be your Huckleberry, you don't have to double dare me. If the world gets wild and scary count on me to be right there…”

12. You Took the Words Right Out of my Mouth (Meatloaf)
“And then you took the words right out of my mouth. Oh, it must have been while you were kissing me…”

13. They All Laughed (Ella Fitzgerald)
“They all said we never could be happy. They laughed at us and how! But ho, ho, ho! Who's got the last laugh now?...”

14. The Very Thought of You (Billie Holiday)
“I see your face in every flower, your eyes in the stars above.  It's just the thought of you, the very thought of you my love…”

15. Day Too Soon (Sia)
“Yeah, I've been waiting all my life. You're not a day, you're not a day too soon…”

Happy Anniversary, Love.  :)  You're my lobster!

Saying Goodbye to The Swimmin’ Lemon

Emma June is my mom’s dog.  Boo Two’s sister.  Little Blue Eyes.  Emmit.  Bullet Nose.  The Swimmin’ Lemon. 

Emma was born in 1998.  Shortly after my childhood dogs, Bull (Big Boo) and Dayzi, had gone to their eternal rest my dad said he wanted another Boo.  He said for mom to go find puppies (free ones, of course) and not come home with one unless it looked just like Big Boo.  Oh, and if she found such a character, she could pick out a second pup too. 

 

We found the Boo-meister in a patchy countrified litter that was supposed to be part Lab, though we now believe his and Emma’s ancestry is quite varied.  Boo sat huddled next to the fence, and aside from his shy demeanor appeared to be the spitting image of Bull.  Sold! Er, taken, I mean.  And then there was also this spunky blonde female pup with bright blue eyes.  A striking beauty.  Mom was in love!  We scooped them both up, and headed back to mom’s. 

Mom accused me of immediately spoiling her Emma.  From the moment I met her, all I had to do was sit on the floor and she was instantly in my lap.  Mom would roll her eyes and say, “You do know she’s MY dog, don’t you?”  Those first days in July 1998 with Boo and Emma were sunny and fun and sloppy wet!  Daddy bought a wading pool and filled it with water for the pups to play in.  Emma was just this little blonde bouncing ball of spirit, splashing in and out of the water, sailing through the air before whipping around to splash again in the other direction.  This earned her the title of The Swimmin’ Lemon.  (Also at this same time, I dreamed of owning a bistro and calling it by the same name.  If I see such an establishment pop up, I want credit.  LOL!)

From then on, all I had to do was say, “Where’s the Lemon?” and she would come running!  She had other nicknames to which I eluded in the first paragraph.  Daddy called her Emmit.  Mom called her Emma June from the beginning, though sometimes the name was expanded to Emma June Nation.  Emma had a way of getting our attention, namely by slapping the crap out of us with her paw if she thought we weren’t focusing enough on her.  Equally frustrating was that she would lean in close, stare sweetly but intently into one’s eyes, and then without warning slam her nose into one’s face.  Bullet Nose.   

Emma wasn’t too crazy about the kids when they came along.  She preferred that they stay on their side of the room and she would stay on hers, thank you very much.  Mom taught the kids that if Emma growled or left their presence, they were to back off.  Emma was protective of little more than herself, while Boo surprised us by constantly being interested in the kids’ business. 

While she kept her interests separate from what was usually going on, she was unmistakably an important part of the family, with all rights and responsibilities thereto.  Apparently, Emma enjoyed napping in the comfort of the patio chairs, which Daddy usually insisted stay pushed up to the patio table.  But not long ago, I overheard Mom ask Daddy if he had pulled the chair away from the table.  He responded, "Yeah, for Emma. She likes that."  

Doc diagnosed Emma with cancer in her mouth earlier this year.  She underwent surgery to remove the tumor, after which Emma returned to her playful, happy self.  But we were prepared for the bounce-back to be short lived.  As the school year ended, Emma’s health deteriorated rapidly.  We could tell that the tumor had returned, and Emma lost the desire to eat.  Mom called me today and told me through tears that Doc will make a house-call this afternoon, and Emma’s pain will be over. 

I am sad.  I will miss the Lemon.  She is a good dog, a wonderful pet, and a loyal friend.  I wonder how Boo will react to being without her for the first time in his life.  Boo gets frustrated with Emma lately, although Mom said Emma got stuck in a bush outside this week, and Boo wedged himself in to direct her out of it.  He knows the end is near.  We all know.  I believe that Emma will join Bull and Dayzi under the Rainbow Bridge, and we will all enjoy her company again one day. 

I wonder if Christ had a sweet little dog,
All fuzzy and wooly, like mine.
With two silky ears and a nose brown and wet
And two eyes, bright and tender, that shine.

I'm afraid that He hadn't, because I have read
How He prayed in the garden alone
When all of His friends and disciples had fled,
Even Peter, the one called a stone.

But, oh, I am sure, that sweet little dog,
With a heart so tender and warm,
Would never have left Him to suffer alone,
But, creeping up under His arm,

Would have licked the dear fingers in agony clasped
And counting all favor as lost,
When they took Him away, would have trotted behind,
And followed Him right to the cross.

~Anonymous~

A New Blog is Born

The previous post really gave me some release on what has been bothering me for the past two weeks. I appreciate the responses I got from everyone! In the midst of determining what to do with my frustration, I have spawned a new blog, One Purpose Driven Mom. I wanted to snag the domain purposedrivenmom.com, but alas, someone beat me to it. But it’s just a page of links to baby stuff, and doesn’t look entirely maintained, so I don’t feel bad about tweaking the name to work for me. My apologies for any offense to other so-named purpose driven moms on the web. ;)

The purpose of my purpose-driven purposeness is to instill a better, more positive, healthier habit each day for the next year. 365 changes in 365 days. Yes, it’s quite an undertaking, but I feel it will be worthwhile.

Feel free to check the progress along the way or join me in the quest for better habits! :)

In Search of Truth (The fight is on with the FDA!)

I haven’t blogged in a while, but I haven’t been far away. In fact, the last two weeks have found me inundated in internet research on - of all things - additives, preservatives and artificial colors.

It all started the second day of our staycation, when we met with the school counselor to discuss Victoria’s standardized test scores (which were fine, BTW) and learned that they (the counselor and teachers) feel that Vic displays ADHD tendencies.

You can imagine my state of mind once that was brought to my attention!

I suppressed my truest thoughts and attitudes for the limited duration of the meeting, not wanting to be in denial if a problem truly existed, but utterly convinced that nothing good had come of this entire year in Second Grade, and now we had wrapped it all up nicely and tied it with a big black bow. Let me assure you, suppressing my words and thoughts did me no good in the end. I was in my doctor’s office within the week convinced I was relapsing with shingles. I should have just let it all out in the counselor’s office.

Those who know me best will vouch for the fact that I am pretty much anti-medication. Unless I understand that a condition will WORSEN without meds, I can summon the strength to do without them. So I was intrigued by the school counselor’s mention of changes in diet that can sometimes subdue these ADHD symptoms.

I must say at this point, denial or not, that I am not in the least little bit convinced that my child has ADHD. I have researched it to the point of going blind! However, I have known her to demonstrate some behaviors that stress teachers out if they don’t have a handle on who the adult is in the classroom, and I have since learned that these behaviors are indeed attributable in many cases to our foods.

My mom says I went overboard. If that’s true, then I’m still in the water. Instantly upon my research quest, I stumbled upon the dangers of preservatives and certified artificial colors. Did you know that the “certified artificial colors” in our foods (like Yellow 6, Blue 1, Red 40 and so on) can trigger hyperactivity much more so than sugar? And look at the reputation we’ve given poor defenseless sugar over the years. In fact, Victoria even informed me several times this year, “Mommy, I shouldn’t eat that dessert because sugar makes me hyper!” to which I would casually respond, “That’s a load of bull,” and serve her the cake. All joking aside, any hyperactivity she displayed was more likely the result of the certified artificial colors in snack foods. The neon Goldfish crackers, the strawberry-flavored milk, the fruit roll-ups. They are everywhere! And not only will they increase the hyperactivity, but they are made from petroleum, and often contain amounts of lead, mercury and arsenic that can alter our DNA. Of course, you say, consumption would have to be pretty significant, right? When you consider that these colors are in about 90% of kid-friendly snack foods, just based on what was in my pantry, then I’d have to say the consumption factor is more than met. If you do the research, these “colors” make High Fructose Corn Syrup look like an angel. As it turns out, HFCS is just hyped-up sugar, and will just make us fat faster. Duhhh.

Did you further know that Australia, Canada and the UK insist on higher quality ingredients in their foods? McDonald’s strawberry sundae syrup, for instance, gets its color from Red 40 in the United States. In the UK, McD’s makes the syrup with real strawberries – NO Red 40 – all because the country insists on it. I feel incredibly duped as an American, and I attribute this disappointment to the FDA. Makes me want even more to join Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution!!!

It took under an hour to rid my pantry of every food with suspect ingredients. We can now, for the first time in probably 8 years, see 75% of the back wall of our pantry – that’s how much food I evicted. The top shelf is practically empty. And I am in serious need of a trip to the grocery store.

Which is what leads me to my “highest level of pissed-ivity” against the FDA. I noticed in my reading that the FDA’s stance is always that “there are no studies which concretely confirm” all the harm that these ingredients can cause us. Nothing to substantiate, eh? I suppose it wouldn’t do any good to substantiate the claims against these products when it would take a fortune to turn our consumerism around, to make the foods with higher quality (and more costly) ingredients, or to – at the very least - RESEARCH the long-term effects of this crap. So basically, if you never test it, then you can’t be held accountable for the damage it has caused? Is that not a noticeable trend in our society? Pardon me, but I’m of the mindset that if it MIGHT hurt me, then it probably WILL, so why go there?!! It’s the same reason I don’t consume anything with saccharin. “Causes cancer in laboratory animals.” And you want to put it in my food?!!!

But then again, people still smoke despite the warning on the package. I get it. I understand the “it’s too big for me to fight by myself” attitude. I have felt that way too at times during the past two weeks. It feels monstrously overwhelming. Until I look at my kids – these little humans that are my responsibility for the next decade. I can’t feed them that stuff anymore. Not knowing what I know now. I have not gotten much support from other moms in my crusade against these ingredients. I’ve heard everything from, “Well, something’s going to kill us, we might as well eat and be happy,” to “Maybe I’m a bad mom, but I just don’t care what’s in the food.” O…...M……G…… Does it have to be only at the suggestion of a medical malfunction that we will admit the benefit of determined change? Isn’t it then too late??

And then…

Getting ready to go to the grocery store, I decided to do further research last night on the naughty-list preservatives, since my research had been so focused on the food colorings. But lo and behold, when I started my search on BHT I was directed to preservatives in cosmetics. WHAAAAA????????!!!!!! Turns out, all the crap I’m trying to avoid in our food is in my makeup, my shampoo, body lotions, sunscreens, and on and on and on… Not only are there preservatives to worry about, but parabens, known carcinogens and chemicals known to cause reproductive problems and hormonal imbalances lurk in literally every kind of product we use. I wash my hair every day with a shampoo containing carcinogenic ingredients. I’ve used this shampoo for five years. My daily facial regimen is even under attack, as my beloved Mary Kay products contain these awful ingredients.

I have to wonder…. Since you can’t go two degrees of separation without finding someone affected by cancer, since the miscarriage rate is so high, since so many of our friends have had fertility issues, since kids are popping up everywhere with ADD and ADHD...can you do any of this research and not see a connection? We comment all the time that our ancestors didn’t have all the ailments we have today. Are our products and our dependency on them killing us, killing our dreams??

There is hope. And help. I found three beneficial information sites and I am grateful they exist: The Center for Science in the Public Interest, Paraben-Free Princess, and Skin Deep, the Cosmetics Safety Database.

No, I can’t possibly undertake the job of stripping my entire home of these harmful chemical ingredients…not all at once. Food is my first step. After that I can focus on one beauty product at a time, finding a suitable replacement until I have eliminated to the best of my ability the ingredients that I deem unsafe for my family and our future. And maybe I’ll have the beauty products under control by the time Vic starts wearing makeup.

If you have travelled this road already, let me know.  If you have information that disputes the ideas I have shared here, let me know that too.  I am on a quest for truth...

...for all of us.